No I am not kidding, my house was seriously invaded yesterday by bugs. Not the inside (very much, I will explain later, don’t fret). We have had problems with Carpenter Bees for a while. They dig holes into wood and it looks like someone just took a drill and drilled two holes about a yard apart, but it was a bug. They were gone for quite a while, but they were back the day before tomorrow’s yesterday. For those of you whose brains are throbbing (it’s the summer, you don’t have to think, right?), that is just a confusing way of saying yesterday.

So now you say, “Dang! That Corey kid is a wimp! A bug or two inside (i think), and a carpenter bee, and he calls it an invasion? Weird.”  Well, that is what I would think if I was reading someone’s blog and I read that first paragraph, but there is not only an invasion of the bees (and inside if you were clever enough to catch that in the beginning), but much more. We did have a wasp or two inside the house. I am not sure one or two, because I smashed one in the morning, and it fell under the couch. I couldn’t tell if it was still alive, because I couldn’t see it (this is when x-ray vision would come in handy). Later, I heard that extremely annoying buzz, so I hit another wasp, or hit the same one again. It fell to the ground and its legs were still moving. I thought it was dead and the legs were just twitching like a lizard’s tail does when it comes off. When I picked it up with the fly swatter, it started to fly straight at me, stinger looking quite painful. Fortunately, it was near the ground, and I have great aim (or was just lucky, some may say…), and smashed it again (that makes either two or three times, but we already went through this). Now it was dead, and I was happy because there was no more buzzing. Yay.

Ok, I still sound like a wimp. Two or three bugs and invasion? I would laugh too, let me tell you (or not, this is already a long post and it isn’t even over! I know, depressing, right?), but I am still not done!

Now I could tell you about the dead black beetles (YEAH Mr. Bug Man!) in the garage or on the porch, or the mosquitoes that cover the yard because of all of the rain recently, but the big part of the invasion is the Japanese! The Japanese Beetles, that is. (Ironicly enough, my mom went on a website to see how to get rid of them, and it said they are never a problem in Missouri, but then again…) ANYWAY, there were hundreds of beetles covering our trees outside. If you stepped outside, you just heard buzzing. It was nasty. Well, one website said to just take a bucket of soapy water, catch the beetles, and dump them in. Then they would die. (You know a bug is dirty if it dies when it touches soap) Well, up for anything, I got a bucket, and out I went. I caught about 70 beetles by the end of the day. The y didn’t like the trees quite as much after that. That evening, we went and got the spray of death! Now, there are maybe one or two beetles on a tree in stead of one or two on a leaf.

Oh yeah, my parents also got wasp and bee killer, so my dad was able to kill not one but TWO carpenter bees.

So, by the end of the day, an invasion had started and been finished. 3 vs. 300. 3 wins. Oh yeah. It was somewhat satisfactory.

Well, my hands are tired, and your eyes are too most likely, so I will let you go kill some bugs for me.

– Corey

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